Some Things I’ve Learned in My 21 Years of Life

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The weather. Can we just take a moment to appreciate this glorious weather. It officially feels like spring here in Arkansas (which I’m graciously praising, because I can wear tanks and sandals now)! Btw, are duck lips still a thing? No? Oh well..

Okay, so down to it–some things I’ve learned in my 21 years of life.

I know–ha-ha–I’m only 21 years-old. What wisdom do I have? Personally, I think I have a lot, but whatever. I get it. I’m in my early twenties, so that makes me naive and slightly stupid when it comes to life and living and all that jazz. BUT, let me assure you have some pretty useful knowledge that I’m about to share with you.

See, here’s the thing. The older I get the more opportunities arrive where I have to make gritty, major-life changing decisions. Here I am, a junior in college, and I can officially see the horizon. It’s bright and scary as hell the closer I get to it, because, like a lot of people in college, I’m over here like what the crap am I going to do after I graduate? It’s a fantastic question. I mean, I’m expected to make something of myself, right? Be “successful”. I hope to make it as a writer. I hope to get into a good MFA program. But hope gets me nowhere. In fact, sometimes hope sucks, because, you see, here’s the thing: all of these things solely depend on me, my ability, and how I choose to pave my way. If I fail, do I give up or keep trying? If I make a decision based on what I think is right, will I go the rest of my life wondering if I made the correct move?

Maybe I’m just a huge over thinker, or maybe you’re reading this like, Yep. Yup. Yesss.

Anyways, here you go:

“Nothing is as bad as it seems.” Stress sucks. But hear me when I say YOU DO NOT HAVE TO STRESS SO EASILY. I am an over thinker, and the littlest things stress me out–my routine being interrupted, not knowing what I’m supposed to be doing in a situation, not having a schedule, surprises, bad drivers, life. I could seriously go on forever, but something I’m starting to realize is all this stress is sooo not worth it. And it’s not necessary.
Take it one day at a time. Stop worrying about next week. Stop thinking about five months from now and what’s going to happen. Seriously, I could be waist-deep in anxiety and stress right now, because finals week is less than a month away. Instead, I’m just focusing on today and what I need to get done. Tomorrow will come and I will worry about what needs to be done on that day. Until then, I’m chill.
Go with the flow. As a HUGE scheduler and planner, I’m learning that I hate it when I plan out my day and something goes wrong. Like, it used to dampen my entire mood, and it would ruin my entire day. I’m really working on just taking things as they come. Looking at the thing from a different perspective. Okay, so I’m late for class. No big deal. At least I’m going to class today. Okay, so there’s a massive line in Starbucks. No big deal. I can use this time to think or browse through my phone and answer text messages (because I really suck at responding back to people and I’m sorry).
Surround yourself with decent human beings. Steer clear from people who drag you down. Choose to spend your time with people who encourage you and want to see you succeed. But don’t forget to be the same for them.
Don’t waste your time on someone who isn’t a true friend. It took me SOOO LONGGG to learn this. I’ve went through numerous friends (some I considered sisters), and even though we’re not friends anymore, I’m okay with it. You can’t make someone be a good friend, and you shouldn’t have to beg for their friendship either.
Friendship is a two-way street. It’s like every other relationship. You get busy in life, but if you really care about each other, you’ll make time. Pick up your phone and text your friend if he/she always texts you. You see something that reminds you of him/her, tell them. COMMUNICATE. It’s the best thing in the world. Don’t be that person that always expects your friends to reach out to you, because one day you will be the person without any friends.
Breathe. Some days, I get so freakin’ busy and stressed, and at the end of the day it’s like there’s this huge weight bringing me down (exhaustion or whatever). Life can get so overwhelming–between work, school, relationships, every day life. Sometimes, I wish there were two of me. But it’s moments where I feel the pressure ball up in the center of my chest (and I just want to scream and cry), where I remind myself to take a breath (and refer back up to No. 1). Everything has a way of working itself out.
There are seasons in life. Nothing is permanent. You will go through busy seasons, slow seasons, impatient seasons, amazing seasons, depressing seasons, happy seasons. Life is similar to our southern weather pattern (unstable and frustrating). Just hold on and keep marching on.
Make time to explore. We are creatures of habit. We fall into a good routine and the rest of the world kinda becomes non-existent (at least for me). I forget that there’s more out there than just home, UA-Fort Smith, and work. Pick a day and rattle up your routine a little. Even if it’s just going to grab something eat somewhere you don’t usually go to, or driving across town to the really good coffee shop that you never get a chance to go to. (Concerts are also a really good adventure, in case you were wondering 🙂
Music is the cure to any bad mood. I am the type of person that you can decipher which mood I’m in based on what kind of song or whichever band is blaring through my car’s speakers. Seriously. I am convinced music can cure anything; my bad moods, my sad moods, my weird moods, etc.
Having patience goes a long ways. I’m impatient. It’s no secret. I despise waiting for things, because I’m a go-getter. (I have that routine I absolutely have to stick to.) Situations come up where patience is required (3:30 school traffic). But lately I’ve been forcing myself to be patient, and it’s working out in my favor. Better things happen in the long run, and it’s all totally worth it.
Drink more water. Our bodies are important, and yes, we’re young and we feel invincible, BUT we’re not. And one day we’re going to be wishing we exercised a little bit more, and ate a little less McyD’s. Stop drinking pop (all that sugar isn’t good for you). Reward yourself with it, instead.
People suck. But you don’t have to be like them. So try to be kind.
Be humble. “Humble and Kind” by Tim McGraw. Listen to it.
Love yourself. You can’t expect someone to love you if you don’t appreciate and love yourself.